Sex Trap or Beautiful, Terrific Love Making

In this episode of sex trap or beautiful, terrific love making, I am going to be raw, real, direct, and open. I am going to say it as it is. This is how I am being guided to approach the subject of SEX. We as a species must have sex to create another living human being. We know that science and technology are trying to play God. To preserve life for the rich and powerful people that can afford it, but this is not the answer or a subject matter I wish to discuss today.

We all have a soul. Some people can appear or seem soul-less, but they still have a soul inside their vessel. What matters most is what you do with your soul. Are human’s here to exploit their soul and sell it to the dark side? Or is one ready to embrace and connect to their soul’s higher self and become one with it? Deciding that in this lifetime, I am going to be a good person and treat others the way I want to be treated.

Sex does play a big part in this answer. How? Well, most people on our planet at this day in time are allowing their spirit to become weak. Giving into lust, greed, pride, and I must have it now attitude. Just watch the show Too Hot to Handle. These horny young adults are stuck in the shadows. They are wounded little children inside seeking sexual gratification, attention, validation, and approval. Some will lie, cheat, play the victim or sympathy card to just have sex with another person. So today, I will support each and every one of you in how to determine if the person who wants to jump your bones is either creating a sex trap or is excited to one day have beautiful, terrific love making sex with you! So, let’s talk about sex!

Like most people, we are not taught about the differences between sex and making love. Schools teach sex education, but they do not teach you about the difference between being used, setup, or trapped into having sex. Teachers do not explain the difference between meaningless sex and how it feels to be making love to someone for the first time. The best way to describe the difference is sex is just an act or going through the motions of penetration. It is called fornication. It is like a job or duty. And let’s be transparent here, many people centuries ago did consider sex just an act of procreation. The family blood line must continue on some would say. Who needs love. Just open your legs and give me a son. As scary as it sounds, there are some people in our world today that still appear to have that attitude.

Sex Trap or Beautiful, Terrific Love Making

I am so glad those times have passed. But we have a new crisis now. People are having sex and do not care anything for the other person. That other person is just an object of lust and desire and nothing more. They will weave their web to trap them into giving into sex and once the act is complete, they are gone. Pretty cold if you ask me. The truth is this happens every day. Hearts get broken, people ghost one another, and then the abuser is off to find its next victim. Am I being too harsh? I don’t think so. I am just being honest.

For example, dating apps and websites. At first, they were wholesome and used to support people in finding a true, meaningful connection with another person. In the beginning this worked for many people. Like all good intentions, someone has to ruin it and dating apps exploited into hookup apps instead. Forget getting to know the person. Just swipe here and you can get laid if that person likes your appearance. Then they got exploited even more into finding new ways to go around the norms of society and allow people to profit off selling their bodies to another person either in person or on video. Again, people gave into their lustful desires to control and manipulate another person who was feeling lonely, insecure, or desperate for some physical touch.

Sex Trap or Beautiful, Terrific Love Making

Sex Trap or Beautiful, Terrific Love Making

When it comes to Mastering the Upper Rooms, one must learn decrement, patience, and self-control. Who is this stranger that finds you attractive and interesting? Are their intentions pure or sinister? You see, sex is about connection. When we connect with another person sexually it feels amazing, right? Yet, when we give into sex and it feels off or disconnected, we feel empty inside, used, and as if it’s just plain wrong.

For example, you can find a person attractive and when they kiss you, it feels like kissing your brother or sister. It just feels wrong! And don’t get me wrong. Some people can fake genuine sex because they are an expert at love bombing. They studied you and asked all the right questions to know your likes and dislikes. Then some are just so hot looking that passion and lust just take over and it consumes you. Again, the sex is meaningless, and one fell for their sex trap. Then there are some that are all about the idea that I am inside of you, I must be so lucky. When in fact, it was just a game to get one into giving into temptation. They won and soon someone will be kicked to the curb. Onto the next attractive victim.

Sex Trap or Beautiful, Terrific Love Making

So, I need to ask you this question. How quickly do you jump into the sack with someone? Is it on the first date, second, third, or weeks later? And I must say that age does play a big part in answering this question. Yes, I was young once and had my fun. The stories I could tell you. Yet, I was kind and considerate to every man I allowed into my bed and into my life. I had moments of being a horn dog. I believe we all can agree that raging hormones can be challenging to control when you get the butterflies, and you want to believe that maybe this person is the ONE! Sex could either bring you closer to one another or it could end abruptly over the smallest details.

And let’s get really specific here. If this person is shallow, self-absorbed and superficial, your hairy or hairless body could turn them on or gross them out. Do you shave or not shave? Do you groom or go all natural? And can this person accept your personal preferences, or do they just judge you harshly and ghost you? This is the world we live in. It is pretty sad.

master the upper rooms

Let’s go even deeper here. Will this person accept and embrace your belly, physical scars, thick thighs, thinning hair line, small boobs, saggy boobs, flat butt or those extra pounds? Or are they going to make you feel embarrassed, ashamed, or bad about yourself or your body? Are they going to try to change you, control your diet and exercise routine, and lifestyle? And if you do as they request, will they now be able to unconditionally love and accept you once you meet their physical approval rating? Let’s be transparent here. All of that is not unconditional love and acceptance. It is conditional love. You are perfectly imperfect. Everyone deserves to be loved unconditionally in this harsh world we live in today.

For example, when we have sex, we use all our senses. Have you ever kissed someone and felt their energy within that passionate kiss? If you have not, it is divine! What about the taste within their mouth? If they have bad breath or do not brush their teeth often, well it can be a real turnoff. Then we have the bodily odors. Some people’s sweat smells fantastic and can turn you on. Another scent of sweat can smell like roadkill on a hot summer day.

What about the sound of their voice? Some people can talk, and your panties will drop. Others will make your skin crawl and you say, no thank you. Sex is an extremely intimate act. That is why it is called intimate. The person is into me, one believes. And it is devasting when one realizes that this whole time, they invested in this other person was a waste of time. That person was fake and was not into you. You were just seen as an object of desire. Not a real living, breathing human being with feelings, a heart, a soul, and a purpose in life.

the upper room

Master the Uppers Rooms and Sex

So, if you can think or imagine the chart to Master the Upper Rooms, anything below 200 is fake, superficial, and meaningless. Having superficial fake sex can be destructive mentally, emotionally, physically, and spiritually. You are taking a risk with your heart, head, body, and spirit. Is this person genuine or a Con artist? Can I really trust this person?

Let me give you one piece of advice. When someone says trust me when you first met them, be aware. A trustworthy person will prove that they are trustworthy by their ACTIONS, instead of their words. Words can be meaningless and hallow. Actions speak much louder than words. When someone says trust me, ask them to prove it to you. If they dare you to do something, have them do it first. If you still do not want to do it, don’t. It’s that simple. We have boundaries for a reason and boundaries should be honored and respected by another person.

So, let’s talk about sin. What is a sin? A sin is when you consciously know that what you are doing and saying will damage and hurt another person. In my opinion, ghosting a person is a sin if you pretended to genuinely like someone and then you vanish. A person should have the balls and courage to tell that person that this new relationship is just not working out. Stop playing immature games and grow up. Nobody likes being ghosted by another person they developed genuine feelings for.

Sex Trap or Beautiful, Terrific Love Making

When it comes to sin, are you leaving a trail of tears and broken hearts? If so, that is sin. And as the saying goes, what comes around goes around. I have heard too many times how someone who was a player found someone they finally connected with, but that person realized their past sexual history. Are they willing to take that risk? Do they believe they can be reform and change your horny ways of chasing every skirt or boy in town? That is why everyone should take their time in getting to know someone. Your body is a temple.

And let’s say you take that risk because you lust after this person. Will you be okay with them flirting with other people in front of you? What if this person tries to make you jealous by flirting to see if you are really into them. Can you handle those immature games, or can you rise above it and know that you deserve better?

Yes, there are a few people that just know it was right and they had sex on the first date. Eventually they got married and treat one another with respect and unconditional love. This can happen, but it does not happen often. Are you willing to put on the breaks and take things slowly? There are so many advantages to this approach.

There are so many examples I could give you. Do you want someone that still lives with their parents in their 30’s? Why do they still live with their parents? Does this person have a healthy relationship with their parents or siblings? Is this person neat and clean or a slob? What if this person has a secret three-week cap on dating someone? Are you willing to take that risk knowing that there will never be a future with this person? What if this person has a pet that you are allergic to. Are you going to make them get rid of it just to please you? Can you sleep next to someone that snores or hogs all the blankets? And can you handle this person’s sexual kinks?

Not knowing the answers to these questions can be extremely stressful if you decide to live together and still do not know much about each other. The living situation was rushed into because this person wants you all to themselves. Now you might have to move out or deal with the drama of another unhappy failed relationship because your lustful desires dominated the relationship before it even began.

master the upper rooms and sex

Sex is just sex. Making love can be magical. So, what is the difference? Sex is just going through the motions of penetration. Making love is about communication, exploration, discovery, connection, and much, much more. One feels truly seen, heard, respected, safe, secure, desired, appreciated, and alive. These are all upper room feelings and emotions. Sex is about meeting a physical need or requirement. If both parties are in agreement to F each other’s brain’s out, so be it. The rules and conditions were spoken and agreed upon. But if you agree to those terms and conditions just to please the other person or get them into bed, be warned. You are only lying to yourself.

Now, let’s talk about the narcissist. It has been my experience that a narcissist can either be a master in the bedroom or a selfish self-centered individual. The confusing part is when someone can masterfully love bomb you into feeling safe and adored, but it’s all smoke and mirrors. Saying all the right things to win your heart. It can be like a drug. I mean one masterful lover can be extremely addictive. Because deep down inside you know they are a player, yet you keep coming back for more and more. Eventually the sweet talks turn into insults, put down, abusive, and destructive. One will eventually be discarded because the narcissist is ready for someone new and exciting. You have become dull, boring, needy, and undesirable.

The easiest way I have discovered to detect who is sincere and genuine is to figure out their attachment style. Yes, people watching, listening, and asking the right challenging questions. Next, what is their sexual turn on or off buttons? Do you match or will their be a disconnect? How do they treat and talk to other people? Are they respectful, humble, and polite? Or do you notice that they are harsh, disrespectful, arrogant, and always complaining?

Sex Trap or Beautiful, Terrific Love Making

Sex Trap or Beautiful, Terrific Love Making

That is why everyone needs to learn to become emotionally intelligent. When one is emotionally intelligent, they will consider another person’s feelings, thoughts, emotions, heart, and self-worth. You intend no harm to another person. With emotional intelligence, you are permitting and flexible to change and you can embrace another person’s imperfections (200). One can see both sides of a disagreement and stay neutral (250). This person is optimistic, hopeful, and has honorable intentions (310). They have this willingness to be patient and supportive when life gets challenging (310). You are accepted, even when you make an error in judgment because they are a forgiving person (350). When you are sick or are stuck at work, they are understanding and reasonable (400). They love and embrace you unconditionally, regardless of you past or present life situation (500).

The polar opposite is not patient and pushes boundaries. This person will make you feel stupid for having boundaries by blaming that you have trust issues and tries to control or manipulate you (125). They might have a big social media following because they crave attention (125) or troll after women that exploit their bodies? I could go on, but I will stop here.

When I look back at my past relationships, I did miss many warning signs. When the person has an anxious attachment style, they were needy, jealous, and insecure. They needed constant attention, approval, and validation from me. Wanting to spend all their time with me. Texting me several times a day and freaking out if it took me over an hour to reply to a text message or voicemail. It drove me nuts!

sex and the upper room

The list of men I met on those dating apps and websites were fearful and anxious (100) about dating again. Blame was much easier than accepting responsibility (30) for their part in the failed relationship. Others were cynical and pessimistic (175). Some would feel shame about their body or appearance (20). Others had regrets (75) that interfered with the relationship. Afraid that they would sabotage our relationship (100). Others were stuck in grief because their spouse died, but they were lonely (75). Some were bitter (30), resentful (75), and angry (150) about their ex. Then there were men that claimed to be separated or divorce but were really still married.

Now, let’s talk about those bad boys. Most of them had a disorganized attachment style. They were hot heads, quick to react instead of responding. Some did not respect authority figures and they loved breaking the rules. Yes, they were mysterious and sometimes dangerous because of their uncontrollable temper, but they can be exciting. These kinds of men can be passionate in bed, and a few can let their walls down. And some women might take that risk to see if they could tame these wild men. Again, is it worth the risk one must take to find genuine authentic love? I would have to say, no. Because these people do not love themselves. They are too angry with the world and their life experiences.

sex and master the upper rooms

I believe you are going to like this story. There was this one guy when I was living in Los Angeles, California in my early 20’s that was gorgeous. When we first saw each other, it was magnetic. I have this Greek radar and he was 100% Greek. Tall, olive skin, long black hair, bedroom eyes, and that smile. It was hard not to want to take him home that night.

We did not have sex the first night or several nights later. When we did, it was like dying and going to Heaven. We both became addicted to each other. The problem was after we had lustful sex with each other, we had nothing to talk about. Nothing in common. We would watch TV and hangout, but it was like all that hot, passionate, what I believed to be love making was now…nothing. No chemistry or connection. It was so strange. It felt like he was miles away and in reality, he was sitting right next to me watching TV. He was so emotionally detached and unavailable. No cuddling or hand holding. It felt like I was one of the guys as his male roommates walked about the house.

Have you ever had this experience before? This person clearly had an avoidant attachment style. They let you in but keep you at arm’s length. These people are torn inside. One minute they want you so badly and the next minute they have something else to do and they are runaway. Afraid (100) of forming that emotional connection with you. In fear that you might break their heart like so many other lovers have done in the past. So, they use work as an excuse to create distance between the questionable relationship or are you just F buddies? They leave you questioning yourself. Like what is wrong with me? Why can’t they have a relationship with me? Is this making any sense?

Sex Trap or Beautiful, Terrific Love Making

Honestly, I dodged a bullet with this one guy. I am still friends with this person on Facebook, but he is afraid to tell his wife. Yes, I honor and respect his wife, but she doesn’t trust him. I would not either. You see, he found me years later online and always wondered what if she was the one that got away. Well, one day his wife called me. She discovered some pretty shady things and wanted to know if he had contacted me. I will not get into details, but let’s say he knew how to use his good looks and charm to encourage several women to do things that did not align with his marital vows.

Since I have morals, values, and integrity I felt sorry for this woman who was pregnant with his child and discovered the truth of his commitment towards her. Yes, they are still married, but he is still shady. Whenever he comes to town, he wants to see me. Yet, I know what he really wants and that is to tempt me into going down the path that does not align with love (500), but lustful desire (125). I will be his supportive friend and nothing more.

Sex Trap or Beautiful, Terrific Love Making

Master the Uppers Rooms and Sex

So, what is the difference between desire for another person and loving someone. I know he does love me in his own way, but his concept and idea of what love means is extremely different. Love would not cheat on another person or manipulate another into having meaningless sex. That is why I say we need to love ourselves first.

Once you align with love and realize the difference between sex and love, it is almost impossible to cheat. You have become a good, loving person. That is what God wanted from all of his children. Instead, we became sinners. This is why Love deserves to be respected, not treated like a whore. Yes, I said it because that is how he would have treated me. My connection and years of working on myself to align with Love is important to me. Plus, I am way more than that and deep down inside and this person knows it. So, they temp you and try to get you to fall from grace. I will no longer sell my soul for meaningless, instant self-gratification.

This is when self-love steps in. Because I could have ignored my inner guidance and said, “What the hell. His wife will not find out.” Then I would become as shady as him, which would lead me down the path of feeling guilt (30) and shame (20) after the act of having sex. And the truth is, we will never align because we are on two extremely different paths. Therefore, as gorgeous as he still looks to this day, I will not give into temptation because I know in my heart and soul that he would wound my fragile heart.

It takes courage (200) to allow yourself to become vulnerable with another person. A relationship is an agreement between two people. Some people respect and honor that agreement (200) and some are just plain evil (30). They consciously and intentionally lie, cheat, abuse, neglect, abandon, betray, and pretend the agreement never existed. Then they flip it around blaming (30) you for the failed relationship. It is all your fault and that you should feel lucky that they put up with you.

upper rooms

All these lower vibration energies are set points which can poison any relationship and destroyed it. It is NOT your job to fix these wounded individuals inside. It is their job to go within themselves and apply various tools that support you in master the steps from 200 to 500. That is what Mastering the Upper Rooms is all about. Going inside yourself and doing the work so one does not ruin their life or another person’s. Getting yourself unstuck and having the courage to change. Courage (200) to do the right thing for yourself, your future, the future generations, and becoming your authentic self.

The truth is all these unsecure attachment styles can change. People can change if they are willing to do the work and go within themselves. Explore those painful feelings, thoughts, beliefs, memories, and emotions. Ask yourself, “What am I afraid of? Why do I put up these walls? Why do I keep sabotaging these wonderful relationships?”

making love and the upper rooms

This leads me into the next example, which woke this man up and shifted his perspective within minutes. I have been working with this man that wants to find someone to love him. He had met many women that are empaths and when he got to close, they backed away. This lead him to feel confused and lost. He wondered what was wrong with these women, instead of looking within himself. This is what I told him.

“You could have love now this very instant. One can align with love (500) because love is unconditional. Your idea and concept of love is distorted. When someone creates expectations and conditions around how love should be or must be, the other person can feel it vibrationally. You could be in love right now with one of these women you admire. The problem is you are not able to love them for who they are inside and accept them as they are. Just because they are not ready for a serious relationship does not mean you should stop loving them. Love takes time to grow and at times we must be patient.

What you are doing is sabotaging that growth. And when you sabotage that grow, you are doing what every other man have done in the past with these women. You don’t get what you expected or anticipated; therefore, you leave. You discard this person as being flawed when in reality, they are not flawed. They are just not ready to give you what you seek. Maybe they want to see if you can be their friend first and accept them for who they are inside. They want to be free, not trapped.

Enjoy their company and discover different ways to experience love. Because I believe what you seek is superficial love or maybe that is all you ever experienced. If you want to experience a deeper meaning of love, become a loving person first. You do not have to sex with every woman you meet. So, I would contact these women you fell in love and apologize. Tell them what you discovered about yourself. Ask to remain friends and see what happens. Prove your self-worth and commitment to becoming a loving person. Things might change or they may not. Either way, love yourself first. Stop trying to fill this hole inside yourself with another person.”

marriage and the upper room

This man knew I was correct. His ex-wife was a narcissist. The only female that ever gave him unconditional love was his mother. He had an anxious attachment style and needed to create a more secure attachment within himself. Like most people, he spent years trying to forgive his ex-wife and after sitting in my office for an hour, he was able to forgive her and laughed. He felt so much lighter because he was finally free. Evicting someone from your mind is a liberating feeling. This is what love is all about. Being able to see all the dynamics within a person without judgment, fear, or criticism. Just have an open heart and listen to that inner voice of wisdom that exists inside all of us.

So, here is our advice when it comes to sex. Take your time. Do what feels right in your heart and head. If they both do not align, find out why. Look for the inner beauty first because the outer beauty changes in time. Yes, wrinkles, graying hair, reading glasses, and a few extra pounds is just fine. So be kind to the person you are visually judging. Seek that emotional connection through direct communication, instead of messaging each other. Talk on the phone, have a lunch date, and show affection without the need to jump the other person’s bones. Some humor here.

Make it personal and intimate. Show each other playfully how you are intimate – “into me”. Savor the fire between you two and allow the fire to increase naturally, without force or the need to burn out the fire because you did not get this person in bed as soon as you expected. Or do you throw gasoline onto the fire and the sex is done within minutes or seconds. Leaving everyone sad, disappointed, and disconnected.

relationships and the upper room

Learn to become self-aware of your thoughts, words, actions, and behavior. Experiment in listen and repeat back what you heard the other person say in those heated conversations. Then reconnect and climb those steps up from anger (150) and back into LOVE (500). Stop having angry sex after a fight. And never use sex as a weapon. This is just evil.

Sex can either be a trap or sex can be magical. You get to decide what kind of sex you want to experience. So, listen to your intuition and do what your higher self is suggesting. And learn to discern the voices within your head. Is the voice angry, anxious, depressed, or fearful. If so, comfort that voice. Stop allowing that voice to dominate your main personality. Listen to the voice that is kind, compassionate, considerate, cooperative, forgiving, trustworthy, accepting, reasonable, and loving. Can you see and feel the difference between the two vibrational frequency levels? One is supportive, balanced, strong, and centered. The other one is scattered, disorganized, unbalanced, weak, and unstable.

We want to end this on a positive note. Sex is always the best when it includes all the upper rooms. And sex is not always satisfying or worth having when the emotional conscious set point is below 200. Remember, your body is your temple. Respect it. Care for it. Love it and embrace it completely. There is nothing sexier than a confident person, wouldn’t you agree? A confident, generous lover is ever better.

Like always, I check to see if this post is complete, and I got reminded of an interesting website I discovered that could support you in a positive manner of learning more about yourself and another person. The website is called, 16Personalities. I took the test and had my husband take it as well. I learned some new things about him. The link is provided within the blog post. Relationships | Specialized Tests | 16Personalities

intimacy and the upper room

Also, I have been guided to create another guided meditation for heartache and relationships. I will include that as bonus material. There will be a two-step process, but I want that to be a surprise. I realize your subconscious and conscious mind must align in the healing process or one might keep repeating the same old patterns and behaviors. So, enjoy! I recommend listening to it every day for 30-days.

It does not have to feel like work, but you are worth the effort you put into it. So, the best time to listen is before falling asleep at night. And if it makes you cry, that’s okay. You are releasing the mental, emotional, and spiritual pain that is being stored within your different energy fields and body. You will know when you are complete and no longer need the process when there are no more tears, heartache, hurt feelings, or any of those other lower frequency vibrational emotions and thought patterns.

So, thank you for listening or reading this blog post on the topic of sex trap or beautiful, terrific love making. Next time, I will discuss evil. What is evil? It should be an exciting topic. Take care.

In love and light,

Angela Myer


Make sure you don't miss anything!